I know that my wife is being completely faithful (I’ve kept VERY close eyes on her) after about a 6 month affair. How long does it take before I get those thoughts of her being intimate with another man to be distant from my mind? I know they will probably never go away, but there is still alot of paranoia. Its been about 4 months since they broke it off.
Everyone is different, but I’ve known no one that can forget. I hope you can if you truly want too. Good luck!
i don’t think it ever goes if she did it once then she may do it again keeping a eye on her says it all you don’t trust her and you never will completely ever again sorry but that’s how it is you will always wonder what she is doing when she is not with you
When the guy stops boinking her…
You’re never going to forget it. And you’re never going to get over it. I have always said, it is not about getting over the past, its about moving through it.
My boyfriend of 5 years cheated on me about 9 months ago. It was a one night thing, but man did it hurt like hell. I still do not trust him 100%. It is going to take some time. Once trust is broken it can take forever to get it back. I realize a one night fling is not a 6 month affair, but it still has the same principle.
I would advise going to counseling with your wife. There is a reason it was an affair and not a one-time occurance. You both need to work on it. Good luck!
you may never…just try to focus on HER with you…let it destroy what you have by over-focussing on it & you’ll end up seeing her with everyone BUT you
The thoughts of her being unfaithful will never completely go away. They may lessen over the years, but will remain there none the less.
It is very possible that she’s had her one time fling and doesn’t have any desires to repeat it but the memories will be there.
What you need to do is forgive her past and accept it. Also, show her some trust. Over time things should improve for you. Good luck.
These thoughts will never leave you. In a few years things may be going great then BAM it all comes back to you. Infedelity should be the reason you would divorce your spouse. She cheated on you sexually with another man, but she also cheated on everyone in your family. Especially if you have children. If people would toughen up and NOT tolerate infedelity so much then maybe we would have less of it.
By living with this woman you are allowing it. And now look at you, you feel you have to watch her every move. Well she’s going to get sick and tired of that in another six months and you’re going to be the bad guy. You cannot force someone to not cheat on you so you are completely wasting your time by babysitting your wife. Let her go, if she wants to do these things, then she just will. But you are the one going to ultimately pay for this.
I can not tell you how long it will take. I did it to my husband over 1 year ago after 10 years of marriage. We both understand that we had our share of the blame but I took it one step ahead. What I can tell you is this, remember why you chose to give it another shot. Remember the feeling of yes, you messed up but I don’t think is worth letting gor for 1 mistake. You know her enough to see is she was really sorry, And if before this she had NEVER failed you then relax. We are not perfect and do make wrong choices. But Trust me if she is anything like me, WE LEARN OUR LESSON. And make it our everyday goal to make up for it. Look in to her eyes and the day you can see her spark then you will have your answer.
my wife cheated onme 20 years ago. it was a one night stand. it took me a couple of years to put it behind me and to get the trust back.
as time goes by it drifts further into he back of your brain and you will reach a point when you rarely think about it.
i don’t believe one can ever forget it, after awhile the thoughts do diminish if the person who cheated does nothing else to make u distrust her. i don’t believe that u ever feel quite the same as u did about anyone who betrayed u, and everyone is different in their reaction to cheating. it takes alot of talking and working on it, before u feel better about it.