Question by Ashley Paige: army question…army wife?
my boyfriend & i have been dating for 5 months. we started dating a few months before he left to go to basic for the army. he moved in with me also, well i recieved a letter the other day & his exact words was “i know this isnt legit because i dont have a ring yet, but will you marry me?” but he also said “i want to make sure your ok with my army lifestyle” & then ive also recieved letters that says hes only home for 2 weeks after AIT & he dont want to rush anything, but he wants me & my daughter to go with him when he gets stationed, but i know to live on base , you have to be married. so i dont know how we would go about doing this? ive never had someone that treats my daughter & i like he does & hes like my soul mate <33 also my daughters bilogical father isnt around, but my boyfriend treats her like shes his. i need advice please ((:
so do you think he asked me that just for the $ $ $ ? another thing..hes graduating next month & he called the beginning of this week asking me for my account number because he wants to give me for the plane ticket & i told him its $ 400 well then hes like well im giving you $ 700.
Best answer:
Answer by Daniel
You have to be a Spouse to live on base housing, however if you look into prenuptial agreements (legal bindings of a sort) you may be able to make it work. He should talk to any officers who are lawyers to get legal advice on making it work. Otherwise you will have to marry him to get health benefits, housing benefits, and everything that comes with being an Army family (moving around, him being away for extended periods of time). I would just remind you that If you wait too long you may send the wrong message, but only you can make up your mind. Hope this helps.
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do what you think is right. Army is the same as any other company.
“ive never had someone that treats my daughter & i like he does & hes like my soul mate <33 also my daughters bilogical father isnt around, but my boyfriend treats her like shes his”
You said it yourself. Sounds to me like you really love him and you should absolutely marry him cuz being in the military, he’s gonna need his other half. I’m enlisted in the Air Force, and having my wife to do everything with me helps alot. Coming home to kisses, food, just that support really means alot to me. It will for him as well. The stress of the military day all dissappears when a soldier/airman goes home to his wife. The additional pay also helps so if you wanna leave with him, no doubt get married or else you guys will be trying to make a living off single pay.
They always said: The military spouse is the toughest job in the entire military. Along with him, alot will change for you as well and you need to be ready. I’m talking things like having to find new jobs/schools when you move to citiies, switching schools for your kid, and the toughest for my wife was leaving her family on short notice. So just make sure you stay prepared for things like that.
So if I were you, I would go ahead and marry him if you love him as much as that ending statement said, just do YOURSELF a favor, and make sure YOU are ready for the lifestyle. The military will take good care of the two of ya, but the life of the spouse isn’t the easiest thing in the world.
Good luck on your decision, I wish you all the best. Tell him I said thanks for making the decision to serve our wonderful country. God Bless.
There are different ways this can turn out. 1 – you could marry a soldier and be an Army wife and family, and will eventually be given living accommodations on base. Until then, the military doesn’t do much at all for fiancees. And if you two do get married, I highly suggest that you seek to have him adopt your daughter. It will make a lot of things a whole lot easier.
2 – It is true that soldiers with families do get paid more because of higher living expenses, but few get married for that reason alone.
Maybe he is serious and wants to have a wife and family as he starts his new chapter in life.
Not all the guys are dicks. if you feel comfortable with him and love him then do it. you are right you do need to be married to live on base. The extra $ $ $ really isn’t that much unless you live off base and found a hole in the wall place to live that allows you to pay minimal rent.
It is stressful being in the military and being a military spouse is about as hard as it gets.
The reason he could be asking right now, is because basic gives you nothing but time to think. After you’re done with the day/night or if you laying awake waiting for your shift to be over, you do NOTHING but think. Could just be he had time to think, misses you and doesn’t want to be that far from you again…..
Here’s hoping he doesn’t get deployed any time soon!