Question by Ralph Smith: Need help understanding my wife..?
ok I just turned 45, she is 42.
IMO, and hers, she seems to be more and more selfish lately.
It all started when she got a job in an all male office (all younger) last Sept.
She purchased a new wardrobe for work even though we are hurting for money, goes to tan bed/nails once a week even though we live in FL, spends a lot of time getting ready for work new different makeup’s, perfume, hair dye etc and all of a sudden wants to get back in shape.

I told her I was uncomfortable with her job and she told me we need the money and we do.
A few weeks later, I checked the local college job listings as we have a good Friend who works there, and found a job offering MORE money more hours and full benefits which we greatly need, money and benefits. I asked her to apply and she freaked saying she is happy with her 20 hours a week and I “just don’t want to see her happy” and this was the stinger and came from WAY left field, brought up my first gf I broke up with in 1986 for cheating on me with my current wife’s friends and how I am comparing the 2 s well as many other hateful things we discussed in Dec finally and she broke down cried and said she did not know why she said those things.

skip ahead to the last couple of months…

She got full time in Jan and since things have gone down hill
She used to help me with my business but the last few months she refuses.
She took care of the bills as far as writing the checks, but won’t even open the mail anymore, we BOTH did our share of laundry, dishes, dinner etc. now I do the dishes almost every morning as she leaves a disaster in th kitchen when its her turn to cook dinner, and she is just washing our children’s and her own clothes telling me mine our too dirty to go in with hers as i work outdoors.
She would call me when she would go p/u the kids from school, just so I knew the kids were being picked up, but now calls her friends and asked me WHY she had to call me when I know she is getting the kids. I told her it was nice to hear her voice as I work alone all day. ok, she would try but usually forgets to call me, but not her friends.
She used to kiss me good morning, good night and hello, good bye EVERY DAY, EVERY TIME, but lately she forgets or thought she did.

NOW I am 99% sure she is not having an affair but what the he.. is going on and how do I fix/change it?

I talked to her a dozen or more times about it and she usually laughs it off and tells me I am too sensitive. To be fair, about 6 years into our current 15 yrs of marriage, she told me I was TOO INSENSITIVE so I worked on it, and guess I did a bang up job.

Best answer:

Answer by Coco
Do you really need money?
You need to understand each other more. Everything is falling apart, so you should find the cause of this.

What do you think? Answer below!