Question by : my wife wants a house!!!?
What is it with you women?? My wife has been begging me to get her pregnant and after?
4 years I did (we are both 39) anyways, I thought she woudl leave me alone after getting pregnant but now, since finding out her friend (whose younger) is pregnant and is buying a new house with her husband…my wife has now been bugging me to get a house (apparently they go show-homing? together for fun and my wife found a house that she really wants) anyways, we live an apartment, i cant afford a house and doubt we will ever get one but now she is bugging me and playing the “whoa is me” game, im annoyed and going insane…how can i get her to back off??
3 minutes ago – 4 days left to answer.
Additional Details
we both dont have kids yet, yeah shes pregnant now ( i though she might be too old you know) but this is really giving me a headache…i am not the “family man” kind of guy…she knew this,i got her preg so she woudl be happy but now this???
btw, her friend is 30 and my wife feels like she wasted her time by not having a family sooner, she blames me but KNEW i didnt want the “family” thing, i like where we are at and this baby should have been enough.
there is just no way we can afford a house, its not in the cards and my wife wont stop talking about it…
Best answer:
Answer by Wateristhesource!
Tell her to work if she wants a house, tell her you can both save up but that she has to save half the money.
What do you think? Answer below!
maybe you should have thought things over before getting her pregnant. Having a child is a life time commitment and providing the best for your child is your responsibility. If you knew the things your wife wanted and wasn’t going to change – maybe you two should have parted ways a longtime ago.
well a house is still a good investment, paying rent gets you nowhere.
mabye not right away but the child will have fun in his own yard etc.
You don’t want kids and yet you got her pregnant…not a bright move sport…as for the house, sit her down and tell her that for the last time, you are not in a position to buy a house, her whining or nagging isn’t going to change that, and if she persists in bringing it up, you’ll be tuning her out in the future…
She’s certainly free to end the marriage and find a guy who will buy a house…or get a job to earn enough for HER to buy herself a house…
Just take it easy. Seriously, especially with your wife being pregnant, during which she may be feeling the “nesting” temptation. A house may seem like a more secure and long term environment for the little one she’s carrying. I know I would have felt the same way, but my husband and I had already moved into our own house by the time I got pregnant.
Unlike an apartment, you can paint and decorate (for instance the nursery) in ways you see fit. Disregarding apartment regulations, and deposits, etc.
In a house you have your own yard, and possibly off street parking where it’s safer to get the baby in and out.
Her hormones are really going crazy right now, so even if this desire for a house were sheerly rational, at this time, her emotions are also invested in it. If you are planning to be with your wife long term, you may want to atleast listen to her side of it if she feels she can explain it in non-emotional terms to you. I can understand where “I want I want I want” sounds naggy, but if she really takes the time to identify her thoughts separate from feelings, she’ll be able to communicate better about this. Give her a chance.
Plenty of homes can be just as affordable these days as an apartment. The current economy is a buyers market, and since you aren’t having to sell, you are actually in a good position. If you keep an open mind, you may find that the house with a child in consideration isn’t a bad idea.
Last week you were a parent with a six year old son. What happened?
I am also not sure that owning a house is a good investment, especially for a family of only 2 or 3 people. Sure, owning has some benefits, such as being able to deduct mortgage interest on your taxes, and building equity that can be re-captured when you eventually sell the house.
However, renting an apartment (in a reputable apartment complex) has many benefits too. The first is that you are not “tied down” to a house which can depreciate in value, and may need costly repairs at a moment’s notice. A reputable apartment complex will keep the building(s), as well as the parking lot and landscaping in good condition, which are things that you would have to pay for if you owned your own home. Also, as a homeowner, you have to pay for liability insurance, fire/flood/earthquake insurance, and so on. When you are renting, you don’t have to pay these costs separately.
Also, having your own private backyard is not terribly important, even from the point of view of raising children. Most apartment complexes near where I live have large courtyard areas between the buildings, and many also have playgrounds for children to play together on.
In any case, we could not afford a house, and also out of principle I would NEVER agree to buy anything in a community where I have to pay for an association each month. Since almost all of the houses here are in HOA communities, I’d rather stay in an apartment and not deal with the association bullcr@p.