Question by Mr Green Eyez: Where do I go from here? Fighting with my wife all the time….I can’t take it any longer….?
I don’t really know where to go from here. We fight all the time. We have one car and I lost my job about 7 months ago. I have been looking but the only place I was hired was miles away. I was soooo happy that I found a Job I felt that everything would be ok, it wasn’t. She needs the car to get around and public transportation does not fall in schedule with my work hours. I had to quit. Now I’m hunting again and all we do is fight. The fighting has got so intense that she starts telling me what other men do for there wife. I told her that she treats me like a 7 year old and she tells me that I am literally because I don’t have a job. All this as I am getting ready for work…Then she tells me that other men can support their wife and all, then I pushed her and called her ugly and evil. We have been together for six years and I have lost many jobs because of our destructive relationship. Her mother is always at our home and her excuse is that she knows I have a temper, and she is aware that her daughter has a mouth from hell and that she is scared I might hurt her, But she says mean shit like this all the time to me. Most of the time I address the issue, let her know what she says was wrong and she tells me she just “keeping it real”. I have bought her ring after ring, when I have money the first thing I want to do is take her out and buy her things. The other day I was getting ready for work and I was rushing, I accidentally left my wedding ring in the shower and I realized it on the way to work, so when I get to work the moment I had some free time and Message her and let her know, “baby I forgot my wedding ring at home, sorry honey this will never happen again’ turns out she finds out and gets on the phone with her friends and starts telling them what I did. One of her friends which so happens to be a girl who works for us, (we have a website business and a hair salon) she work with us from our home. Turns out she starts telling my wife about what she heard I said to my sister when we were going through problems. And then tells her about some chick that claims we slept together before we knew each other. All this and all I do is right by her. I don’t party, drink anything. I am totally devoted to her. So I tell her I don’t want her in my home anymore because I see that as a deceptive person who is in their own sneaky way trying to cause drama in my life because hers is not the way she wants it. This woman comes in my home and speaks to me everyday and does this. So then I tell my wife as we are fighting that she is just jealous of us and she says to me….”Trust me she is not jealous of you”…… Now I am living with no job and a mentally abusive wife and no where to go. My mom says I can’t move in and all of my sisters have problems. I know that there are worst cases but this case is only going to lead me to an early death. I’m 32 and my self esteem is lower than ever before, and I am truly trying to honor god in my life. Guys………I’m am for the first time in my life have suicide flash through my head…..I’m at the point of no return….
Also…..Just to give you guys an idea on how much I love her. I was at work the other day, I see and young lady with her toes and nails done with these really nice designs and all, I say to myself my wife would look so nice with that. So I tell myself when I get my first pay check im going to go into a spa/salon, pay the lady whatever she wants for the designs I like, and just pick my wife up drop her off that way she can’t say no, and let her have a day of pamperment, toes, nails, massage the works. And before I could live up to that she does this. I aaaaaaaaaaaaalways think of her. I have taken her to nice resturaunts and suprised her with diamond rings at the end of the meal. I mean guys I may not be rich but I like to pamper my woman when I can. I cook for her alllllllllllllllllllll the time. I take her everywhere she needs to go. I accept her friends and she tells me I have no say so on who comes into our home if they are her friends…And I feel like if I leave now that im 32 nobody will want me. I don’t have a job and I’ll be just a divorced loser. I know you say thats not true but hey, humans judge you based on these things, it’s a fact of life….I just feel miserable….Sometimes I go to my friends house and he likes to smoke pot from time to time, lately I’ll take some for myself and It has really been helping me. And I haven’t done this since college. Might not be right but it makes me laugh and happy most of the times. A little tired but I fight though that……But it really does help.
For you who actually take the time to read this….Thank you. for this is really the only way for me to vent.
Best answer:
Answer by free_angel
Stop being such a wimp. Get a job and tell your wife if she doesn’t like it, too bad, and she should be so lucky that you decide to go back home.
What do you think? Answer below!
well you need to focus on your job situation. keep looking. try to find jobs that are in the area…even if the job is “beneath” you right now, it’s still money coming in. just keep looking for better jobs.
about the wife- it sounds like she’s a hot-head. i wouldn’t discount divorce. tons of people are divorced these days and there is no longer a “stigma” about it. its just how things are.
it would be so much better for you if…you stop venting here ..instead you need to communicate with you wife and get to the bottom of you issues . Next time you get a job hang onto it.
You poor guy I am so sorry she does not know what she has. It sounds to me that she is pretty selfish and more about herself which I am sure you don’t like to hear where you love her the way you do but she is really showing her true colors. She should not be talking behind your back she is the one that married you she said yes also.
Have you ever seen fireproof? It is about a guy in a marriage that is breaking up big time and he has these steps he has to go through to build up their relationship. You have already done a ton of it but perhaps you will want to rent the movie and watch it with your wife so she can see the result of the fighting and stuff. When you fight use kind words she may say things but you love her so to give her the love she deserves don’t speak unless you know it won’t hurt her. Think of her and not yourself that is a hard thing to do in a relationship especially where she talks to you like that but perhaps kind words from you will switch things around. Keep having faith in your relationship and you will make it through this I promise. Love can beat anything and just let her know how hard your trying do the cleaning go all out let her go to the spa just like you were saying. Good luck I hope all goes well for you
I’m sorry, but I couldn’t even read all this petty crap. This woman isn’t even close to the kind of REAL woman that’s out there. This is just another selfish, petty female that’s manipulating someone to keep the gravy-train coming her way. Trust me…she will be an ongoing, continuous hag-n-nag either until you drop dead, or get a job and start the cashola flowing her way again.
She is obviously not at all sympathetic to you at all…..so…I ask you…why oh WHY would you stay with some hag like this???????
Seriously…you are more than free to email me man…..I’m not just spouting off. Women are horrid creatures anymore. They are selfish, petty people that you absolutely do NOT need in your life.
Granted, you have your part in the whole scheme of things, but sometimes one person is the catalyst for the derailment of a relationship, and a woman will pick and pick and pick and never shut the fvck up long enough to give you a break to even think straight.
You are way better off by yourself than to be with someone like this….oh MAN….get your affairs in order….go to an attorney….file for divorce….and call this pig-from-hell and tell her adios.
She will berate you and put you down over and over again. Grow some balls and leave her!!!! Get out on your own….make a life for yourself. It may not be easy, but hey…..it will be easier than to have this albatross shackled around your ankle!
Good luck man!!
i think it’s time you do whatever you want!!!! take control and never look back. your story makes me sad, people should never let themselves get this down. it will make you believe there is no way up but you have to pull yourself out of this, man! there are brighter days waiting for you.
I can’t quite figure out why you say you love your wife so much. Nothing that you said suggested a single good quality she has. You need to spend some time on that.
Get a job. If necessary rent a car, join a car pool, take public transportation. Then either move out or get into counseling.
You play the victim… right into her hands. Who taught you you’re supposed to be manipulated? And you play the victim here when you write about how much you give her and how mean she is to you. Grow up and take responsiblity for your life and your relationship! Stop whining about what a wuss you are and grow a pair!
Your not alone. Me and my wife fight over money problems too! Sucks!
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You don’t have a relationship issue…
You have a communication issue. You should try counseling. Your communication style is judgmental and accusatory. The more you can remove yourself from your emotions, engage in blameless opinions, the better you can dig deeper into your needs, her needs, and how you two can rekindle what you once had.
NOBODY gets married angry and spiteful. There was a time when you were happy, charming, and “in love” so time to go to work!!!