Question by voracious_me: WIFE IS PLEADING AGAIN. I AM NOT SURE HOW WOMEN ARE ? CAN SOMEONE HELP WITH THEIR MOUTHFUL ?
We married about 4 years ago. Of that since last 2.5 years we have been separated. I am a US Citizen and she is from Burma .
I met her 1st time when I was posted in Rangoon in the Pacific. It was a marriage that took place with full consent of both the sides.
Immediately after marriage I brought her to Houston w/ me. and spent 1 1/2 years as married life. Then later on I was called back to Rangoon and brought her back to her hometown. We stayed there only for 2 weeks and she left for her parent’s home . I decided to find some local work in Rangoon and told her I’d be staying there and wrote her letters asking her to come stay with me in Rangoon. She ignored the letters , phone calls and refused to come to my new home in Rangoon.
So after coming back from US , she decided to ignore me for 1 1/2 years. It reinforced my doubts that she married me to come abroad & now that I am not longer her ride back to Houston, she does not care,

Time passed and I decided to return back to Houston. Somehow she came to know that and she and her family “beg of me” with folded hands – “please forgive her” – she is just a child ) age – 30 yrs ).Everyone is now in sorry tone. Initially their tone was it is both people’s fault both you folks should grow past differences and mend again.
Now the tone is “Oh we can understand all your going though , its all her fault , no fault of your , she is a child . and it wont happen again . But PL PL PL if you don’t take her back her life is spoilt. No one will ever marry her who can treat her like you did”
Now that is NOT all.

There was a lot of water that had flown under when we were in Houston together. Immediately coming there – she was a tight lipped person. You could not get her to listen to you or open up everything to you. I mean things didn’t smell natural right from the beginning. So I ADMIT I had to start peeping in her emails and conversations. Her one face was that of this innocent country girl who likes to be taught things your way and then her emails tell me of a person who does not have any sense of gratitude, she talked in the most disparaging manner about my parents.
Stuff like ” When his mom dies…..his dad will automatically pop off …hahaha…and his brother is just a dumb fool..hahahah…..and his moms mileage does not seem to be too low now…….had been not for my uncle I would never have married that fat ass.”
Ok I eavesdropped in her phone talks but I would not have known the other side of stuff without it .
She hated the very site of my parents. When they come visiting me for just 3 months . She applied to other men with matrimonial proposals find a way to run out. I wanted to divorce her then itself but her parents apologized to me and convinced me – that will be the last time.
There was another occasion when she bit and scratched me on my hand cos I uttered some stuff about her and her family that she did not like.
There was another occasion when she called in the cops “shouting – I want divorce right now”. I was never physically violent to her – period. Somehow I convinced them of the real motive and they left without any complaint being filed.
I was the money maker 100 % and she was the home maker , well I am not sure if that is 100% . Despite that she started acting very violent when I started financing my brother’s grad school and showed her aversion
All that said and done, we had our golden days , primarily cos I entertained her and fulfilled her picture of this “Tinsel town America” – taking her to all exotic places. All these memories and her left over clothes HAUNT ME. I FEEL GUILTY. IS IT THAT I AS A MAN DID NOT KNOW HOW TO MANAGE STUFF , WAS THERE MY FAULT SOMEWHERE ? AM I A SOCIAL MISFIT ?
After being separated , I never really flirted but looked at other ways to distract myself – like stocks , newer business ventures and essentially

I don’t want to hesitate admitting my dark side
<> I don’t party and frolic a lot like other folks. She likes those brand of folks. I was brought up and am a teetotaler .
<> I have strong ideological principles on the basis of which I run my life and that drives my decision. e.g. I Sincerely believe in America’s War against Islamic Terrorism and having known certain facts I don’t want my money to contribute to the terrorist cause directly yes but more so & ,especially, indirectly.
There were occasions where she asked me to get her bollywood DVD’s with film stars who were essentially involved with islamic mafia. I cannot even follow this bollywood urdu / arabic language but she can and she does not care if the spoils of the money spent contribute to islamic mafia. This is my view point. People can differ.
So I refused to buy her that DVD. No way from my money – you can get it from the money u earned working at the Mac.
But she would insist, just to prove that I am not “normal thinking” like others. I have strong reservations on stuff. When there is a get together and there are
When there is a get together and there are other “Liberal” minded people she would make every effort to “expose me” and embarrass me.
<> I definitely don’t look bad but I am obese with puppy fat. since last 5 years. That has made be kind of inactive and lazy but yet by I never flinched on my basic duties as a hus.
<> Well if my partner will not tell me the truth I will make attempts to get it out at any cost including snooping her mails and calls. This – she abhorred.
<> I hated spending times in malls and shopping around whereas she would literally disappear for hrs together in a mall, when I wanted to leave in 1/2 hrs cos, I had to take rest and report for work next day.
Here are some things that got us better together
<> The times I entertained her and took her to all dinners, holidays and recreation.
<> She was a good cook. But I had dietary restrictions. Her cooking was more oriental while I preferred Western.
<> She did all the housecleaning , laundry, and helped packing whenever we relocated. But in retrospect I never had so much kitchen ammo , when I lived single. That grew 10x after she bought the tonnage of kitchen stuff and helped packed it if we moved to another place.
<> She had a good sense of humor hard to find in women.
<> Sex was perhaps the only time we never fought. I wanted more but she got tired.
Now I am hung on this issue – emotionally she keep weeping when I tell her I want to quit but logically it tells me this is all calculated attempt to force reunion cos she has no other person to use and I am the last shop whose shutters are not completely closed according to her.
Also I know from past exp that she can easily get crocodile tears out at any spur of moment and then completely stop like turning off a tap.
But I am getting these repeated appeals from her folks.
I threw this open to my dad who is a HR Behavioral analyst and he remarked that the only relation between the 2 of you is like father and child. You like to behave like a superior and she likes to be a kid . In a marriage – partners should be equal mentally to exchange ideas.
Everyone around me tells me it wont work but those are my relations and well wishers.
So I thought lets get some more thoughts about whether it is worth it to give another chance.
She claimed she always loved me etc but here is the letter that I caught that she wrote
To another man with whom she tried to hook up.
“heyy,
you don’t feel like you came in my way of marriage. you are soooo nice and caring…he and his family are narrow minded people…I don’t have any feelings for him. I don’t know but I really get happy to receive your email than him..
so how is your life…anything new….wishing you very happy Christmas and new year..
Regards, Heather”
Can this kind of person really love someone ?
Thank you folks

Best answer:

Answer by schmittyrkd
Wow. Interesting story.

I’m not sure what the question is. And the end of your post was truncated.

I have a hunch you’re a troll.

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